friday

lower case f.

Well, this ain't going to be a chipper message, but all in all, it's really not that I am extremely down right now either. I'm in a weird mood today, that's all.

I am still thrilled to be 145 and liking my body: what I previously believed to be the impossible.

I am exhausted. It's all for happy reasons, but no matter what being exhausted makes me cranky now that I am very used to getting good nights' sleep. I didn't used to mind being tired when it was my permanent state of affairs.

I'm moody because I am moving on Sunday. As I've repeated several times, this is full of mixed emotions. Most of all, this year has made me so emotionally and mentally exhausted that any change feels like a huge hurdle. I have come a long way since being dark and twisted day in and day out, but most of my changes have been physical rather than psychological. I have been waiting for the moment of living alone to start rebuilding my brain.

I'm moody about boy-related stories which I wont get into. I am an impatient person, and I am in a bit of a confusing situation right now. Waiting for someone to make his move and it doesn't seem to be happening...argh.

I took a cozy, drowsy long nap after work, which was amazing. I followed that with a gigantic, plentiful salad. I have almost used up all my food here, which means less stuff to bring to the new place on Sunday. I just want to enjoy tonight alone in my loft, because tomorrow I will be packing all day and it will be my very last night sleeping here. Four years and this chapter is almost closed. Sad. Well it feels sad but I know it will be good in the end...

Okay, enough blabbering. Sorry for the rant.