Mixed bag

Hi people!

I remembered one of those blog post ideas I had that I forgot when it came time to write. It is in fact about parenting but it was just a thought / piece of advice for other parents.

So when you're pregnant and once the baby(ies) arrive, people always tell you "Oh enjoy this while it lasts because it goes by so quickly." These well-intentioned people are the same ones who tell you to stock up on sleep. I have two things to say about this.

1) You cannot stock up on sleep and, nowadays, everyone in their right mind is well-aware that having a newborn means your sleep will likely be horrible for the next long while. I wasn't sleeping well throughout a large chunk of my pregnancy and was actually getting better sleep once the babies arrived. Not more, but better. Whether you slept for a week straight before the birth or were already sleeping badly, fatigue is fatigue. I almost felt "prepared" for the lack of sleep because I was not sleeping well beforehand. Also, no one tells you that there is a small chance you will be able to sleep if, for example, you have one baby and that baby isn't sick and is bottle fed (sharing night duties with the other parent). With twins it is unlikely that both parents won't be needed most of the time, especially for breastfeeding. The important takeaway is to keep your expectations low, always ask for / take any help you can get to get some shuteye and remind yourself that it won't last forever. Now, at 5 months, I am fortunate that my babies are sleeping through the night (7 p.m. to 4 a.m. then back to sleep until 6:30 am). This happens for some babies at 2-3 months, for others at a year old, so I'm smack in the middle if not early. That is a huge blessing since I've twice the potential for shitty sleep.

2) This brings me to my next point. There is one way to interpret the "enjoy it while it lasts" advice (which, by the way, I find very gloomy to say to someone and it always makes me sad, so I wish people would stop saying this to me; plus, I AM enjoying it while it is happening, apart from the shitty stuff, but do people really expect that telling you to enjoy it will make you enjoy crying/pooping and all that glorious stuff?!), it is to understand that any good/great progress in your baby's development (namely with respect to sleeping or fussiness) really should be appreciated for what it is, with no expectation that a few hours later the situation will stay the same. Every time my babies started to sleep longer, I would get all excited thinking it would stick. Then, that night would be awful. I am slowly learning to appreciate those great nights without expecting that it has officially become habit. So even though my babies have "slept through the night" (which doesn't quite mean what it sounds like: it really means sleeping a 5-6 hour stretch) for over a week now, I know that any number of things could change that at any moment: a busy day that makes them overtired, sickness, teething, a growth spurt, allergies/indigestion once they start eating solids, change in routine, new learning milestones, separation anxiety... So THAT is how I interpret "enjoy it while it lasts" and would recommend any new parent do the same.

On that same note, last night was the first night the babies slept in their own room. It was sad but necessary to be able to reorganize our whole home to make room for a caged-in play yard in the living room since the babies are getting shifty :) This is how it is when you live in a relatively small space. For each item in, one item out. We got to test out our very "Paranormal-Activity-esque" night vision baby monitor cameras. The downside: we got no sleep because of nerves. The upside: the babies slept better than ever (7 pm to 5 am) since their own room is much darker and quieter without us in it.

Things do really go so quickly...